[Paisleychick-lj] Spending the day in Uruguay...
Beatrice M's blog
blmurch at gmail.com
Wed Sep 17 07:14:04 EDT 2008
[Cherry blossoms in the late afternoon], originally uploaded by [blmurch].
I thought this was going to be very boring and that I'd find a cyber and kill-time. Instead, I left myself be led around by a sense of discovery and took paths through the town I'd never noticed or taken before. I stopped to examine the pink blossoms on the small cherry tree; peered at some yellow lichen growing on the 400 year old city wall; appreciated the old and abandoned train station; delighted in the overpowering aroma of the mounds of sweet blooming jasmine; watched dogs jumping and barking in the river; took in the view from the top of the lighthouse I slowly climbed for the first time; peered inside the Basicila del Santismo Sacramento; marveled at the leaf-cutter ants harvesting portions of the cherry blossoms in the late evening; and delighted in the beautiful sunset over Colonia from the ferry. I didn't touch a computer once. I was able (for the most part) to forget about the banks collapsing, the stock market undulating down and up and just enjoy noticing the small beautiful things. It helped immensely that the sun came out while I was having lunch. It was chilly and overcast when i arrived and I didn't think the sweater sufficient. I even bought trinkets in a tourist shop - a mug, a magnet, a pair of earrings and some chocolate. By the time I boarded the Eladia Isabel back to Buenos Aires and caught a beautiful sunset, I realized I'd had a pretty picture-perfect day. I walked the most I have in over a week, gingerly minding the old and new cobblestone streets and slowly climbing the stairs while using only my right knee for leverage.
I haven't gone out and photographed for the joy of it in a while and yesterday was wonderful for that. I got around 40 decent shots of various things that caught my eye. I have put them up on f[lickr - hope you enjoy clicking through the set]. I have found that in Buenos Aires I am not letting myself be led by so much of a sense of discovery any more. I have the false sense that I know the city. I know some barrios, but the city's HUGE and there is much I have not discovered. We aren't traveling anymore. We have our own apartment, kitties, a business. We are pretty settled here. I want to recapture that sense of newness and yesterday I found that it's not as hard to delve into as I'd thought. I have another photo assignment for the mag and it's in my next-door-neighborhood - Congreso. I'm hoping that I can approach it with the same attitude I had yesterday - I think I'll enjoy it more if I do.
Now that I have declared myself a photographer, I am finding my self-confidence lacking. I'm not putting as much on Flickr as I used to. I'm scared that people will look at my work and think - "what are you nuts?!?!?!" Now that I'm learning more about the art and process of photography I'm a much harsher critic of my shots. I'm afraid of being "discovered for a fraud" and I just have to get over myself. Obviously, not everything that I shoot is good - but also I have to remember that not everything I shoot is crap either. We are all our own worst critics. Lots of people go through a phase where they think themselves fraudsters - taking a look around their peers and wondering when they're going to get "found out" for the hacks they unfairly think they are. I have to remember that this is normal & at the same time unfounded. People like my photographs. I've started to have my photos published in magazines, have had two successful art shows and people have paid me to have my art hang on their walls. I'm not a fraud, I just have a long way to go and a lifetime left of learning of the craft, the art, and my own process of photography.
: http://www.flickr.com/photos/blmurch/2864918854/ (photo sharing)
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